Where to Meet Men and Make Real Connections

In today’s dating scene and the myriad social options that keep growing around us, asking where to meet men almost results in an embarrassment of choice in today’s buzzing varied social scene.

How we date has changed so much that it often feels like the true bounds of this modern dating arena are constant and infinite. Be it meeting a guy at that hot new bistro downtown, or over the water cooler at your local gym, finding where to meet single guys has become a much more open and casual process.

However, it can be a lot to take in sometimes. So, let’s cover some relaxed places and activities to explore your dating options without venturing too far out of your comfort zone.   

You should also check out another article in this series, dating advice for women for a broader look at modern dating for women.

Some of the best places to meet men

Regardless of your interests or the kind of things you enjoy doing, you can still often find where to meet men through the kind of activities that can also help to enrich your life. 

Where to meet men in your local bars and venues

It can sometimes feel confusing knowing where to start with local nightlife, but it still is the second most popular way to meet people after online dating apps.¹ It’s important to find the right place for your nightlife experience. So, go for venues that seem to be your style, from relaxed country nights to warehouse rave parties.

Perhaps also explore more relaxed festivals and outdoor concerts to meet new people, if you don’t feel up to the intensity of downtown nightlife.

On the positive side, knowing how to attract men is often a less prominent issue in these environments, as modern nightlife culture still encourages men to initiate conversation. But this can also mean needing to set firmer boundaries in these interactions.

Get yourself a hobby

You could try pursuing something that’s always piqued your interest, or maybe go for something crazy and new you’ve never tried before. The point is getting involved in a community and seeing what opportunities arise from that step, be it a venture to find out where to meet men, or simply to expand your horizons.

But if you’re looking for more specific dating opportunities, a recent survey from Date Psychology² found the most attractive male hobbies to be:

• Reading
• Learning foreign languages
• Playing an instrument
• Cooking

This is obviously dependent on personal taste, but maybe it’s time to get into a reading or baking club. Perhaps you’ll meet a guy who shares your passion for freshly baked beignets. 

Take advantage of local group tours in your area

Being a tourist in your own city can be a fun and somewhat revelatory experience, especially when you discover hidden gems and growing art forms you didn’t know were taking shape in your city. Or explore some of the popular nature trails nearby, which can also serve as some of the best places to meet men who share similar interests.

It’s also a great space to meet people in a more social and guided way, without having to introduce yourself randomly to a stranger on some lonely, abandoned trail. Often, the concept of learning and exploring together can really bond a tour group and lead to unexpected social events that aren’t always romantic. But every opportunity to experience new things and meet new people can lead to other social opportunities. That’s the great thing about communities.  

Don’t be afraid to ask your friends for help

It may seem like being set up on a blind date by your friends feels so unbearably 00s, but it’s still how almost 20% of couples get together today.³ So if it’s worked for a fifth of the existing populace, why not at least give it a try if you’re wondering where to meet men?

Often, it’s just because we don’t express our needs to those closest to us that they go unnoticed. Just casually mention it’s been a while since you had a decent date to some of your friends and they likely can conjure a decent list of eligible singles. You just needed to make your needs heard. Which is important in dating too.

Get involved with your community

Often, for those living in a sense of populated isolation, it can affect those of us who struggle to reach out to each other. The idea that you live in a community can become somewhat dulled in the frantic urban milieu. That sense of pointless continuity can keep us from reaching out to others.

But there’s often a lot more happening around you than you think, and this can be the perfect opportunity to meet not just men in your community, but also feel more connected to those around you in general. Check your local libraries and community centers to find interesting causes and activities to get involved with and meet like-minded people.     

Try to join a sports or activities club

The US is incredibly into physical activity for either health or lifestyle reasons, with over 21% of Americans engaging in some kind of sport or exercise daily.⁴ And you don’t have to swing ropes in CrossFit, or take up winter jogging either. It’s more about finding new things that help you push your boundaries, but in a way that fits your priorities.

If you’re wondering where to meet men, try an activity that’s always seemed exciting to you like kayaking or cycling, for example. You not only find a passion, but an interesting community of people that may include some interesting single men.  

Consider your workplace

While meeting and dating someone you work with has never had the most favorable reputation, it’s actually become unusually common as young people put more and more focus into their careers, networking and dating.

According to Forbes, 60% of adults have had workplace romances and 43% of respondents reported meeting their spouse through their work⁵. That’s a strangely more prominent statistic than connections through nightlife.

Obviously, these interactions need to be handled with respect and the proper workplace protocol, but it seems like an emerging dating statistic can’t completely be disregarded; there’s an opportunity to make connections with men who share similar goals and values. 

Making connections with men in your everyday life

Try to be more open to the idea that dating opportunities can crop up in any part of your day. Perhaps you’ll share a funny 2-minute conversation at Whole Foods with some random guy. Perhaps you’re wondering where to meet men when you’re already meeting them, it’s just that many of these social interactions feel inherently short-term or passing.

But why do they have to be? All it takes is that small step from someone who has sparked your interest in a supermarket checkout line, to becoming someone you’re having coffee with 20 minutes later to explore if there’s anything there. Try to capitalize on these moments. Who cares if you had to ask first? The point is you got to meet someone new and possibly build something special. 

Where to meet men? Start putting yourself out there more

The important thing isn’t about finding where the most eligible single guys are all congregating, but rather where the ones who fit you are, and what you’re looking for from your romantic experiences. The sporty outdoors types, the life of the party, the brunch-time foodie, the one who prefers warm afternoons in cool libraries. It’s about you.

Whether it’s on an online app for relationship seekers, joining a new sport or being introduced through friends, the origin story doesn’t really matter, just the destination. Try not to worry about asking where can I meet a good man alone, be open to enjoying the journey as the road meets you.

Be willing to perhaps be surprised by the universe when you decide to take the chance on something real and put yourself out there. Whatever dreams and trials may come.